8.25.2004
Mail Myself To You
I had a dream this morning that my boss was telling me kindly and gently to get up and go to work. I opened my eyes and Jack was mid-meow an inch from my face. Sometimes he looks like a lab rat.
Made it here by 10:20 AM which ... is an hour and 20 minutes past the last possible moment I could be close to on time.
I don't really know any statistics. I don't think anyone else in the world does either, so no ones ever pointed at me and said 'the emperor has no clothes' or 'that stripper singing 'i rocked the cradle of love' has too many clothes' or..
Oooh, I just remembered a spectacular olympics launch Shira did into the mosquito net, this AM, followed by a twirl/backflip so she landed trussed up and swaddled in tulle or organza or whatever that thing is made of. What a sexy cat. Reminds me of that scene in Monkey King in the beginning when Joker is the robber baron and the spider immortal is still bad and she is hanging out in the Joker's robbers den to look for the monkey king and the robbers attack her while she is taking a steam bath in their hot tub and she launches herself out of the bath and spins into a red curtain, beating them all up and getting dressed at the same time. Ka-pow pow pow!
Anyways. Avg arrival time for the past month: 11:07 AM. Standard deviation: 90 minutes, which means I almost always arrive between 9:32 and 12:43 PM. Official time when I am supposed to be here: 8:30 AM. I should say that there must be a considerable amount of skew in the distribution towards 12:43.
That said, here I am. I'm licking envelopes. No sponge, no tape, I'm licking 'em. I figure real human spit will emit pheremones that might increase our survey response rate. I don't think me and empiricism were meant for one another.
Comments:
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Is Monkey King a euphemism for something rude? Sounds like it should be.
Re. your last blog: As long as you're not singing bloody Gloria Gaynor ballards I think it's perfectly acceptable to sing Kareoke alone in strip bars. Did anyone try to stick money in your pants?
Re. your last blog: As long as you're not singing bloody Gloria Gaynor ballards I think it's perfectly acceptable to sing Kareoke alone in strip bars. Did anyone try to stick money in your pants?
Monkey King is a powerful rebellious spirit who achieves enlightment, unparalleled patience and forbearance after centuries of pranks, temper tantrums, time travel, farting jokes, and wars with authority. Following his comeuppance, he finds and achieves his true purpose, a lifetime of service helping the Longevity Monk bring the Sutra to China. And I think he helps his alter ego in a parallel life find true love, that may be a modern addition, a sop to todays filmgoers.
It was initially written by a monk in 1400s but I know it as a Hong Kong retro-action drama I really like, with an immensely complicated plot and lots of costumes.
It was initially written by a monk in 1400s but I know it as a Hong Kong retro-action drama I really like, with an immensely complicated plot and lots of costumes.
Well, I live and learn.
I think people who start to sing 'I will survive' on kareoke should receive massive electric shocks through the microphone - they'll soon learn. Is that too controversial? I have nothing against Gloria herself, just pissed up women who can't sing, torturing her songs.
I seem to get less tolerant the older I get.
I think people who start to sing 'I will survive' on kareoke should receive massive electric shocks through the microphone - they'll soon learn. Is that too controversial? I have nothing against Gloria herself, just pissed up women who can't sing, torturing her songs.
I seem to get less tolerant the older I get.
I have to say that Wild Honey is a great Karaoker. She nailed 'Sweet Child of Mine' at a local watering hole and had all the drunken indie rock boys ON THEIR FEETS.
I personally would not attempt 'I will survive' in Karaoke. But WH has the range, she could do it.
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I personally would not attempt 'I will survive' in Karaoke. But WH has the range, she could do it.
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